Tuesday, May 6, 2008
I'm sick..
Ok.. so this post is probably going to be boring to most, but I need to talk about it. I am almost 9 weeks pregnant and the nausea is hitting me hard. I am away from family and away from any help what so ever. I feel overwhelmed and like an awful mother. I try everyday to make sure that Jaidyn is kept in good company. Sometimes, which has been mostly everyday this week we watch movies during the day. I can't take her outside because I get really nauseaus when I stand up, and going in the car is a torture. I want to know if other people have felt like this. Felt incapable of handling the situation they've been dealt. I am so thrilled to be pregnant, and so blessed that I am going to have 2 children. I just wonder if I can make it through these next few months. Please someone tell me I am not crazy for feeling like this. I strive to be the best mother I can, and if it means making Jaidyn her favorite meal for lunch even if it means I throw up during the process. I am willing to do it. I just wish that "OUR" husbands (for most of my friends) had a normal job. Where I could have a break at 6p every night. I know that each of us our dealt our own challenges and we learn to overcome them. This is one of mine. I will get through this. I am sorry for this spill on my emotions. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to.
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8 comments:
Well I understand EXACTLY how you feel!! Although when I was sick I didn't have another child which I'm sure is how my next pregnancy is going to be. It's ok to say that it's hard because it is it doesn't make you any less grateful or excited about your pregnancy. I had people tell me that you shouldn't complain and that you should just be grateful. It's hard I have never been through anything like it but just keep in mind that there is an end in sight and it is COMPLETELY worth it!! Hang in there as long as you don't completly neglect Jaidyn she is going to be fine. She won't remember this later!! You are doing great!! Call me anytime even if you just need to cry or vent!!
You are not a terrible mother. The fact that you are worrying about it makes you that much of a better mother, because you are so mindful of Jaidyn's needs. Think of it this way, you only have three to four short weeks of feeling like this and then the (in my opinion) hardest part of the pregnancy is over and you can get back to your life again. But you are your toughest critic.
When I first had Mabel I felt so overwhelmed. I was super excited to be a mom and I was really happy. But I was overwhelmed with the amount of responsibility and the non- stop care that a baby needs and the thought of how much our lives were going to be changed forever. Like anything it gets better with time, so hang in there babe. I am thinking about you and praying for you. You can do this!
I remember laying on the floor in the kitchen when I was prego with Ryker, thinking is it really possible for me to get up and get Kennadee lunch. I don't remember what happened (I think I try to block it out) but she managed to live. It will only get better.....
You are NOT a bad mommy! Everone has days like that! Heck I am not even pregnant and there is nights that Callie woke up a lot and I just feel so tired and onery...and like a bad mom! But all we can do it try! You are too cute! Lenna always tell me the only person who makes us feel guilty is ourselves. So don't let yourself get there! I hope that is gets better! And as for the hubby's job, I understand that too! Tony works a 8-5 job but then he studies from 5-9 or later. It sucks but he is providing for the family and that is all I can ask of him. I know if it was up to Tony or Taylor they would rather be at home with us and the kids. Good Luck Rach! Love ya
Oh my little Rachy poo! I am so sorry you are sick! I was in the same situation (we were living in Cali when I was 9 weeks and deathly ill) Pat was finishing up finals FULL TIME and I had to pack up our house to move with no help! I thought I was NEVER going to make it through that!
Dont feel guilty about turning on a movie for Jaidyn and laying on the couch all day! You need those days and she will never remember. I have always believed you have to take care of yourself first in order to be a good Mother, and this is your down time, so take it easy. Jaidyn will be fine and probably happier in the end!
I love you and have been thinking of you. I hope it gets better for you soon. Call me if you need to talk. xoxoxo
hey this is random--but I found your blog through our "mom blog and I can't pass by a fellow pregnant woman in need without passing this on. I was SO sick with this pregnancy, laying on the couch, throwing up everything I ate, etc. I was so miserable all day/night. I live in Italy so I totally know what you're talking about feeling like crap and being away from all family and friends and having your husband gone ALL the time! And you have a kid already! I can't imagine. Ask your doc about ONDANSETRON hydrochloride tablets, it changed my life! Its the generic brand for that super expensive anti-nausea drug- it costs me like $10 a bottle instead of like $30 a pill. I'm 30 weeks and if I don't take it I still throw up so it has been incredible for me. I am scared to death of being super sick when I get pregnant again and having a kid, I can't imagine what you're going through! If this doesn't help you hopefully you can find something that does! Good luck, hang in there!
Rachel!! I am sorry to hear that you are still feeling so sick. I wish I had better words of advice, considering we are only 2 weeks apart, but I don't know how to manage my sick days at all. But I can tell you one thing, Jaidyn will be grateful for anytime you have to give her. I bet you she knows a lot more about what is happening to you then you think.... my little nephew came up to me when I was sick at my moms a couple of sundays ago and rubbed my belly and said "hi baby" and then blew the baby a kiss....you can't help being sick, and Jaidyn Loves you regardless of what activities you do during the day!! I hope you start feeling better... have you been to the doctor yet?
Your so cute! Paul says he loves you and thinks your amazing. Sorry you are so sick. That is my biggest fear about going away for medical school is that I will be sick and pregnant and not be able to do anything and there is no one around to help. Your such a cute mom though. Hang in there things will get better I'm sure!
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